Stubborn


MH is stubborn.  He’s so funny.  I’ve been asking him to sit with me with his hand on my belly to try to catch one of Roo’s little kicks that she gives me at night.  MH will do it for about 2 minutes and then is over it. He gets so frustrated so quickly.  Then, when she starts to kick up a storm and I tell him, he gets stubborn and won’t come back. I’ll let him come to me and I know in time he’ll feel her.  She’s an active little girl and I know she’ll let her Daddy feel her kicks soon!

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If you’re here from ICLW: Welcome!  I’m in the middle of my second trimester of my second pregnancy (first one I lost at almost 6 weeks) with my first take-home baby – I hope and pray!  After our loss, we tried and tried each month with each cycle ending in tears and disappointment.  Six months after our loss, I went to a fertility specialist.  Because of my age, they did all the requisite testing and came up with a DOR diagnosis – finding me with fewer than half the amount of eggs I should have during a CD3 follicular u/s.  I was very disappointed – actually devastated.  Following that diagnosis, we tried a couple of IUIs with Letrozole without success and I started to look for answers elsewhere.  That elsewhere came up with a diagnosis of elevated natural killer cells.  We were told that my chances of getting pregnant and keeping the pregnancy beyond the first few weeks of conception were slim.  More devastation.  After much debate/discussion/research, we decided to move onto IVF.  The last natural cycle before starting the BCP for the IVF cycle, we were surprised with a BFP.  In all, our journey from going off BCP right after our wedding to our loss to this pregnancy was a year and a half.  That’s not as long as many but it was long enough for me to seek out the infertility community, which embraced me with open arms.

Today, I’m taking this pregnancy day-by-day.  It definitely has its ups and downs.  I try not to complain because I’d rather be here than not be pregnant.  I try to embrace the positive and negatives of pregnancy but accept the fact that as much as I wanted to love being pregnant especially because of the many trials that we encountered to get here that being pregnant is not my cup of tea!!  I hope you continue to read and follow my journey even after ICLW for March is finished!  Leave a comment and I’ll be sure to stop by and follow your journey too – we all need support and cheerleaders no matter what stage in this adventure we are in.

 

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