The Stigma of Infertility

Why is it that infertility is a hush-hush topic?  I’ve been wondering about it myself lately.  I actually write another blog, which gets pretty decent traffic but I’m afraid to write about my infertility on it there.  Partially because I want to protect husband’s privacy.  MH is very private and as much as I don’t believe any of his friends or family read my other blog, I would hate to betray his trust.  I also don’t want to write about my loss or my infertility on that blog because I’m afraid that it would turn completely into my infertility and my fears.  I’m sure that I would lose readers pretty quickly.

I believe that unless you’ve walked in the shoes of a woman who is infertile that you cannot comprehend the roller coaster of emotions.  It helps me to write about my experiences to make it through and I’m so grateful to have a platform to share (even if I have no readers).

It certainly helps that some public figures have been open about their infertility problems like Giuliana and Bill Rancic and Rosie Pope.  I thank them for being so open.  But, the stigma still remains.

The definition of stigma is mark of disgrace or a characteristic defect.  I’m shocked and appalled.  Infertility is not a choice.  It is not something that I wanted to become or to have.  However it does make me feel defective – though it should not.

I want to make it a goal of mine once I’m through the emotional toll to try to figure out how to make infertility more of a topic of discussion.  Infertility should be covered by insurance.  All insurance and in every state.  And it is not.  I know that because our insurance does not cover a penny of my treatments.  Everything we are doing is coming out of our own pockets.  It is a tremendous shame.  Getting pregnant and giving birth is not a luxury.  It should not be considered an elective medical treatment.  It is a “disease” if you will and should be treated as one.

Infertility should not be stigmatized.  We should be able to talk about it with our friends and loved ones.  I just don’t know how to get there myself.  It’ll take some work.  Any thoughts on how to remove the stigma of infertility?

2 thoughts on “The Stigma of Infertility

  1. Amen sister! I have been a lot more open lately about my journey. I really want to educate people because some people say the most idiotic things. I’m sure they don’t mean to. Infertility should be right up there with all the other disorders/disease, with education/research/etc.

  2. Pingback: The Stigma of Infertility – Part II « A Miracle In the Works

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